Kirkepiscatoid

Random and not so random musings from a 5th generation NE Missourian who became a 1st generation Episcopalian. Let the good times roll!

I had remarked to a friend the other day, "You know, this summer is unseasonably cool...just like the summer of the '93 flood." That was an interesting summer, when NE Missouri became an island nation. Everyone on Highway 63 from the Iowa line down to the Hartsburg turnoff north of Jefferson City was literally living on an island, bounded by the flood waters of the Des Moines River on the north, the Missouri River on the south, The Mississippi river on the east, and the Grand River on the west.

The devastation in Cedar Rapids and Iowa City seemed too close to home and it certainly triggered old memories of 1993 for me.

So, in honor of the fact we had five inches of rain dumped on us in Kirksville (six in some places!) I dragged out one of my favorite jokes that emerged from the receding waters of the 1993 flood...

A curious fellow died one day and found himself waiting in the long line of judgment.

As he stood there he noticed that some souls were allowed to march right through the pearly gates into Heaven. Others though, were led over to Satan who threw them into the burning fire.
But every so often, instead of hurling a poor soul into the fire, Satan would toss a soul off to one side into a small pile. After watching Satan do this several times, the fellow's curiosity
got the best of him. So he strolled over and asked Satan what he was doing.

'Excuse me, Prince of Darkness,' he said. 'I'm waiting in line for Judgment, but I couldn't help wondering. Why are you tossing those people aside instead of flinging them into the Fires of Hell with the others?'

'Oh those . .' Satan groaned. 'They're all from Missouri. They're still too wet to burn.'

3 comments:

That is deliciously darkly funny!

Stay dry - although it could come in handy otherwise.

NE Missouri must be one of the more unnoticed spots I can think of; so that's Kirksville?

As to floods, me grew up in lower Mississippi River Flood Plain; folks go to town by boat some months.

"Unnoticed" would be a gross understatement. When people think of Missouri in a "tourist-y sort of way," they are thinking KC/STL, and the Lake of the Ozarks. We literally are in the middle of the "flyover zone". Someone once told me the number of commercial jets that truly do fly over Kirksville on a given day, I forget the exact number, but it was impressive.

Kirksville gets the worst of both worlds. It can be -35 wind chill in the winter and 110 degrees with 100 percent humidity in summer. My cousin who spent 11 months stationed in Iraq said 130 degrees in Baghdad did not "feel" as hot as 100 degrees in Kirksville.

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Kirksville, Missouri, United States
I'm a longtime area resident of that quirky and wonderful place called Kirksville, MO and am wondering what God has hiding round the next corner in my life.

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