Kirkepiscatoid

Today’s readings focus on the value of silence.

Reflection questions:

1. Contemplate whether or not you are comfortable with silence and solitude.

Yes and no. There are times it is welcome. There are other times when it is painful and uncomfortable. I was thinking about that last night. One of my best friends is leaving pretty much for good tomorrow. A lot of our time last night was sitting together in silence. She even remarked, “Isn’t it weird that at a time we probably need to be telling each other a lot of things, we’re just sitting here saying nothing? I said, “That’s because talking hurts worse. Saying nothing and just being seems to feel better.”

On the other hand, there are times that silence seems awkward. There are times you are dying to “hear an answer” whether it is from someone in your life, or God, and you are hearing nothing. That silence is tough.

2. Do you bring yourself to silence in order for God to be brought to consciousness? If so, write about how you foster silence in your life. If not, what would you need to do to foster silence in your life? Are you ready to do it?

There are times I have “Silent Saturdays.” Usually once every couple of months. Since I’m a fairly loquacious person, I’m sure some people would find this odd. But on Silent Saturday, I just don’t talk till noon. Of course, living alone makes this easier, but I don’t even talk to the dogs. What is kind of neat, though, is I don’t seem to HAVE to talk to the dogs...we seem to get our messages across! But what I have found is when I shut down my voice, my brain really kicks into gear. It is a good time for me to sit and write on the keyboard because my fingers seem to be able to “talk” with a different voice.

3. In what ways do you “listen to the cacophony” within you? What do you learn by listening to the cacophony? As you “listen” does the noise lessen?

This is a tough question. We’re back to my issues with “compartmentalization”. I have a tendency to view the “cacophony inside me” as a distraction separate from the silence inside me rather than the location of the silence inside me. It is very hard for me to sit still with my own disarray. I have described it before as “bumper cars inside my head.” There are times, though, I can sit still long enough and the bumper cars start to move in a counterclockwise circle.

The other thing I can do when I am not able to sit still long enough to deal with my own cacophony is to absorb myself in noise around me. For instance, one night I was sitting outside and I noticed the cicadas were making a ton of noise. I was able to crawl inside THEIR noise and mentally be in a peaceful place. I have always been able to sleep in the middle of noise. In fact, I have problems falling asleep in silence. Crawling inside the noise of others or other things? No problem! Crawling inside my own noise? Not so easy! I am not sure why my own noise is so unnerving; usually it is not as “noisy” as the outside noise. But I need to learn to crawl inside my own noise better without help of other “outside noises.”